There is disasterous potential

I learned that not only do we have to worry about the complete thermo-nuclear destruction of the planet due to accidental missle launch after Y2K blitzes out all of our communications systems, but if by chance we do survive, we potentially have to face an equally destructive fate. The allignment of the planets. Yes this will make for one awesome eclipse of the sun, but more importantly, it could throw all of us from the planet into outer-space and end life as we know it.

Most of you would probably fail to see how this will cause massive destruction to the planet, so here it is. Anthropologists have done numerous studies and found proof that the rivers on earth have changed their directions three times in history. All three times occured at exactly the same times when astronomists have predicted that the planets perfectly alligned. The allignment of the planets causes the north and south poles to switch polarity. Simply put, if you were to stand on the equator before the planets aligned with a compass, the needle would point to the north pole because that is the positive pole of the earth. However, directly after the universal allignment your compass would suddenly point to the south pole.

When the planets allign they cause the rotation of each individual planet to reverse itself. By reversing the spin of earth you would also change the polarity of the planet. The reverse in polarity will, over the long-term, cause the rivers to change directions. Now this doesn’t seem that taxing, but in the short term there is disasterous potential.

Imagine a yo yo. If you twirl the yo yo around in a circle with the string outstretched, the string holds the yo yo on it’s set path. But if you were to let go of the string all of a sudden then the yo yo would shoot out away from your hand in a straight line path. Now imagine us as the yo yo, the planet as your hand and gravity as the string. We are constantly spinning around at an immensely high speed but we dont’ feel it because the whole planet spins as one unit. However, if the planet’s rotation suddenly slowed to a stop, our bodies would keep moving at that high rate of speed and the force of gravity would not be enough to keep us from shooting out of the atmosphere into space where we will all suffocate and perish. (pleasant eh?)

So my brothers and sisters, my advice is to build a cave about forty feet underground and fortify it with cement ceilings that a herd of elephants could tap dance on and hang on for dear life. Oh and I would have this done by May of next year.

Author: Christopher the Cynical
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    Comments

    1. Eugene says:

      today is april 16 2002. the planets have alligned and im sure of it!!!

    2. Robert says:

      What’s going on actually? Today is 17th April 2002 and i heard on CNN that the planets will allign.But im 100% sure that i’ve heard the same thing two years ago.
      Did it happen before? I’ve checked my Astrology CD and indeed there is something odd going on out there.Suggestions apart from building a cave?

    3. merlin says:

      Hmmm, excuse me if i am the cynical one but as this has happened before ( 1962 ) and i appear to have been born SINCE that date either it is one great big cover up ( and my parents lived in a cave! ) or it will come and go like last time and we will all survive! (damm)
      Oh yes and your physics is flawed, as the combined effect of the increased gravitational pull would be the equivalent of holding a football at arms length i think that we might survive! :P

    4. joe says:

      you are an idiot. even if all the planets and the moons alligned to the sun and you were hiding in your cave, i would still be chilling on my back porch sipping on margaritas. again, you are an idiot.

    5. uhm...no. says:

      Just so we are clear the reversal of the earth’s polarity has nothing to do with the rotation. On Fact it is as of yet unexplained, and it would change magnetic north to south but it would not be the result of a catastrophic event. Try reading some geology books instead of apocalyptic sci-fi…maybe stop watching television too….just a thought.

    6. uhm...no. says:

      Just so we are clear the reversal of the earth’s polarity has nothing to do with the rotation. On Fact it is as of yet unexplained, and it would change magnetic north to south but it would not be the result of a catastrophic event. Try reading some geology books instead of apocalyptic sci-fi…maybe stop watching television too….just a thought.

    7. r u crazy? says:

      R u a phyco or something or is there something wrong with ur mind? Geez i mean think aboyutn this? Do u really think that juts because the planets alligne that we will be hurled into space and suffocate to death? I mean like dream on.

    8. ESP (Extra Special Pimpin) says:

      I don’t think things are gonna fall off the planet…or whatever…LOL

      But the mind and the way we feel or act will change.

      If you are into “inner energy”? Well…things will be a bit strange…

      I see more and different…I have seen weather change just by mood swings…and I know the planet has something to do with it too…

      I wish I was able to explain…or could fins a zodiac message that could help understand how to fix some of what is going on around us..

      But I will say this…change is comming…and it will start in the minds of the few…and it will change the way many of the “Strong and Mighty” see themselves…and in some cases…they will seal there own fate by how the treat the few who the care not for….”Now if that aint some strange shit? Than what is?”

      It was said”the last will be first and the first will be last” Well the planets are changing back…and so are thoughs rules too.

      Damn…what would you do when you found out your kids are now mutants…LOL and so are you?

      All I know…is that the planets have to be the blame for some of the strange stuff going on round us lately….

      But falling off the planet?

      Ok…will someone please send me a few bucks…I’m kinda real broke right now?

      whodathunkit01@hotmail.com

      get at me…

    9. mike says:

      if the earth is spinning so fast why don’t we feel it

    10. brad says:

      look yall, hes both right and wrong, yes if the plants alligned i believe that the magnetic poles would change, not due to the planet spinning in a opposite direction, however due to a massive gravitational pull from our larger planets, namely jupiter and saturn…. and we would not be flung out of orbit, cuz yes its happend before and were still here, however the thought is that many meteors would hit earth, and becuase of all the electicity used in comon day, we would have a massive power failure, thus having to rebuild all electrical equipment, it would be like a emp blast that is so devastating it would permanantly destroy all things powered by elecricity. and no it did not happen in 1962, yes SOME planest alligned but not all it only happens once every 130 thousand years or so

    11. brad says:

      oh and we dont feel the earth spinning because a. its not spinning THAT fast, and b. because youve felt it since the day you were born, you know when you spin your self around and get dissy, you get dissy because you are temporarily spinning faster than the earth and when you stop it takes a few minutes for you brain to recolect which way your still spinning

    12. Candy Man says:

      Some of what I have read here seems reasonable. However, some of it is really simple minded. The polarity of Earth will not change just because the planets align. It is caused by a change in the directional flow of the Iron in the Earth’s core, which is cased by proven changes in the Earth’s rotational speed. When the liquid iron begins to change direction, the poles begin to “flip”. We also begin to notice a decrease in the stregnth of the magnetic field because of the core’s flow pattern changes. Some pretty drastic changes occur on Earth during the polarity change cycle. In Oregon, scientists have discovered that the poles can move as much as 6 degrees per day during a flip cycle! They found this in the lava samples they studied. There may be more cases of Cancer due to more radiation reaching the Earth’s surface; because the Earth could possibly have several “poles” during the flip cycle. This would allow more radiation to reach certain areas of the Earth’s surface. I don’t believe that we will be tossed into space. That is very difficult to believe, but the change is happening. Look at the weather pattern changes. Also, look at what sailors have documented. They keep track of where “true north” is and it is not where it used to be. It is constantly moving, I know, but it is getting further and further away from where it started.

      Just Food For Thought

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